Revelations and Reflections, Valentine 2014 Pt 1

"He looked at her but he didn’t see her. He saw this idea” — Paris, Texas 

"I think love is something people make up to make themselves feel better." — Dandelion

The realization that came to me a few years ago, but which was suddenly lost in the void, yet came full circle within the past (24 hours? Week? Month?).

What is love? (baby don't hurt me..Oops, lyric).

Those two quotations had the greatest impact on my realization and musings on "love," and they recently come right back to bite me. Let me explain.

What is love? From a philosophical standpoint, we love as an extension of ourself that we seek out to fill as a primordial part of ourselves from which we have been separated. Whether separated due to the great stepping down of dualities when Self and consciousness were being born, or but for the fact that we have fragmented ourselves along the way in our spiritual enlightenment, we still seek to once again fuse the gap that has separated us.

In our quest for love, we all have, create, and find the IDEA of love, this idea of fulfillment. But that is all that it is. An Idea. It is onesided. We see a projection of ourselves in something else that we define as love, and therein lies the trap: it's a projection. People project things all the time: most of our feelings, even though we are unaware, are simple projections of ourselves and our desires. When we love, we see this idea of what we imagine—and want—love to be. This is why "we" "create" it to make us feel better. Because it makes us feel whole, like we were in the beginning. This is also why marriage is a union into oneness/wholeness, and why sex is symbolically the same: a union of opposites, a completion.

But insofar as love, the problem arises simply because it is onesided. Because we singly create it for ourselves. And this is why people get hurt and why "love" doesn't work.

It's only when two people, mutually, look at one another and see the same illusion, when both see the same idea about the other person that it works. Then it ceases to be onesided, it ceases to be a longing for some idea created and projected by and existing only for oneself, and it becomes a mutual ideal wherein two people can create a life together. And THAT is the essence of love. The only essence of love. Unless two people have that idea—that illusion—TOGETHER about each other, nothing will work.

Two people looking at each other and seeing an idea (read: ILLUSION).  Only together..

Otherwise the idea is more false than before, and never works.

"He looked at her but he didn’t see her. He saw this idea”  

I saw her, all right, so I don't think I'm guilty of that. But I also created the "idea" of how I want her to be. So, maybe I didn't see her after all...

~Selah